....Mer needs to find the words to accurately express her disappointment in your selfish behavior...I also think that you are dumb enough to think tat this isn't about you which is why I fell ok putting it here for all of my fb peeps to see....
Please note blog readers that this isn't about any of you unless there are people out there reading that haven't mentioned it to me and again I fell confident that the person that this is referring to is shallow and dumb enough to not think that it is about them.
The only reason keeping me from putting this on my fb is my husband...he does not approve of venting on fb...he prefers I blog to vent or talk it out with the person or persons involved.
And he's probably right.
Monday, September 28, 2009
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Pity Party for 1?
I had a mental breakdown yesterday. I cried at everything and nothing at all . I couldn't handle my husband, or my children. And it all started with some incomplete home work.
Here's the thing though I shouldn't really have any since I live in the luxury of being a SAHM. It's for the school, remember how I am the treasurer for the PAC? Well there are certain reports that need to be made and submitted to the government in order to get what little funding we get. And as it happens I am in charge of them, (I know it's the funniest things ever me in charge of the money math) and they are due in Victoria by Wednesday. Without my home computer I have done as much as I can but can't really do the financial statements because all of the info is in the accounting software in the computer. Yesterday I cried about this. Which made my husband call his mother and ask if we could borrow a functioning computer that she doesn't use, since it's a spare (long story about teenagers in jail who don't get their Christmas presents). Then we drove the hour to pick it up and the hour home and then he spent nearly 3 hours setting it up to have what I need on it and to work properly. After that he made my financial statements for me while I watched in awe of his ease with spreadsheets and math and things that hardly make sense to me that I am certain was the equivalent to days of me crying and banging my head on the wall. By midnight it was all done. Do I still feel upset about it? Not really. Does he know just what to do to make it all right for me? Yep.
About the rest of the funk that I have been in? Well imagine your days are filled with countless hours doing something that makes you feel happy ( like: knitting, sewing, quilting, baking, bike riding) and suddenly through no fault of you own you are no longer able to do it the way you like...you can ride the bike but only for an hour indoors in the evening as opposed to being able to go out and ride all day, and the bike you are riding on has a seat that isn't formed to your butt. Get the picture? While admittedly it's not bike riding and I am talking about computer usage it upset the way I normally, like to do things. I don't think I have to justify that any more than I already have. I feel like I coped amazingly well about it...until yesterday. There's more to it too, I was having some missing my people (friends & family) feelings, and the adjustment to grade one hasn't been the happiest days of his life, he (Gabe) is rude and ungrateful to me and that doesn't help me to feel love and appreciation, and he brother might be starting on that path if you don't knock it out of him quickly. We are working on it. He is in tears by the time we get in the van on the way home from school most days because it was too long and he is tired and hungry. It's getting better. Michael has been ok, he spends the better part of the afternoon asking if it's time to go get Gabe yet, but once we get him all they do is bicker and fight. He naps if we are driving at that time of day which is a nice little change.
Now I am sitting at a computer that feels like mine and is for all intents and purposes. I don't notice a difference until I see the desktop or look for favorites. What about ours? It's at the shop being fully diagnosed. And all of our data is on the nifty little external thingy.
I feel like I have loads of other things I could go on and on about but I need to get on with the day.
P.S. This is not a pity party it is a vent.
Here's the thing though I shouldn't really have any since I live in the luxury of being a SAHM. It's for the school, remember how I am the treasurer for the PAC? Well there are certain reports that need to be made and submitted to the government in order to get what little funding we get. And as it happens I am in charge of them, (I know it's the funniest things ever me in charge of the money math) and they are due in Victoria by Wednesday. Without my home computer I have done as much as I can but can't really do the financial statements because all of the info is in the accounting software in the computer. Yesterday I cried about this. Which made my husband call his mother and ask if we could borrow a functioning computer that she doesn't use, since it's a spare (long story about teenagers in jail who don't get their Christmas presents). Then we drove the hour to pick it up and the hour home and then he spent nearly 3 hours setting it up to have what I need on it and to work properly. After that he made my financial statements for me while I watched in awe of his ease with spreadsheets and math and things that hardly make sense to me that I am certain was the equivalent to days of me crying and banging my head on the wall. By midnight it was all done. Do I still feel upset about it? Not really. Does he know just what to do to make it all right for me? Yep.
About the rest of the funk that I have been in? Well imagine your days are filled with countless hours doing something that makes you feel happy ( like: knitting, sewing, quilting, baking, bike riding) and suddenly through no fault of you own you are no longer able to do it the way you like...you can ride the bike but only for an hour indoors in the evening as opposed to being able to go out and ride all day, and the bike you are riding on has a seat that isn't formed to your butt. Get the picture? While admittedly it's not bike riding and I am talking about computer usage it upset the way I normally, like to do things. I don't think I have to justify that any more than I already have. I feel like I coped amazingly well about it...until yesterday. There's more to it too, I was having some missing my people (friends & family) feelings, and the adjustment to grade one hasn't been the happiest days of his life, he (Gabe) is rude and ungrateful to me and that doesn't help me to feel love and appreciation, and he brother might be starting on that path if you don't knock it out of him quickly. We are working on it. He is in tears by the time we get in the van on the way home from school most days because it was too long and he is tired and hungry. It's getting better. Michael has been ok, he spends the better part of the afternoon asking if it's time to go get Gabe yet, but once we get him all they do is bicker and fight. He naps if we are driving at that time of day which is a nice little change.
Now I am sitting at a computer that feels like mine and is for all intents and purposes. I don't notice a difference until I see the desktop or look for favorites. What about ours? It's at the shop being fully diagnosed. And all of our data is on the nifty little external thingy.
I feel like I have loads of other things I could go on and on about but I need to get on with the day.
P.S. This is not a pity party it is a vent.
Saturday, September 26, 2009
I am still here, somewhere. Still not on my own computer. I don't want to complain about it any more though because it's getting old.
I am not really in the happiest of places right now anyways and the computer thing just adds to it. I have a month worth of pictures on the camera.
blah blah blah wah wah wah whatever
I am not really in the happiest of places right now anyways and the computer thing just adds to it. I have a month worth of pictures on the camera.
blah blah blah wah wah wah whatever
Saturday, September 19, 2009
Aneurysm
All I really have to say is that I still have no computer but I am getting better at using the laptop. Also if it isn't fixed by tomorrow I may have a brain aneurysm about my meeting on Monday for which I am not prepared because everything I need is on the computer...it's safe, as in not ruined...I just can't get to it.
Michael will be 4 on Wednesday...where did the time go? Also if you haven't seen him in a while you should know that he is tall...like taller than whenever you saw him last.
Michael will be 4 on Wednesday...where did the time go? Also if you haven't seen him in a while you should know that he is tall...like taller than whenever you saw him last.
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
still no computer fix...maybe it would get fixed faster if it was inconveniencing someone other than me? grrr.
Also remember how a few months ago someone had suffered a loss that I couldn't even express? Well...long story short her dad just died too and I would really appreciate your prayers for her at this time.
Also remember how a few months ago someone had suffered a loss that I couldn't even express? Well...long story short her dad just died too and I would really appreciate your prayers for her at this time.
Sunday, September 13, 2009
I would like to put up pictures but since I am on the laptop I can't. I feel like it's time to get into a full scale post about something but laptop is not my most comfortable place for doing that. And I have no idea what I would get into full swing posting about since I can think of nothing...OK that's not entirely true, but PAC drama that is about to begin about being 6000 dollars short on funding isn't something I think you want to hear about. Maybe when I get my computer back I will have something to say.
P.S. In true back to school style the boys are up a shoe size each, and we are selling Entertainment books. They are a great coupon book for you 'neighborhood' and we can even get you one for your neck of the woods and not just ours if you are interested, let me know because this year we really need to raise dollars to compensate for the government short changing us 6000 dollars (that's only 20$/student at our school, but it goes a long way)
P.S. In true back to school style the boys are up a shoe size each, and we are selling Entertainment books. They are a great coupon book for you 'neighborhood' and we can even get you one for your neck of the woods and not just ours if you are interested, let me know because this year we really need to raise dollars to compensate for the government short changing us 6000 dollars (that's only 20$/student at our school, but it goes a long way)
Friday, September 11, 2009
6 mins remaining on library computer... shit 5
The teacher is so excited that I can speak french and can't wait to get in a routine where I can come and read with the kids! I am happy that she recognizes me as a resource. in other news my computer better get fixed this weekend! I might just explode if it doesn't. Library computers and husband laptops are good in a pinch but the screens are small and the mouses are not mine!
gtg 3 mins
The teacher is so excited that I can speak french and can't wait to get in a routine where I can come and read with the kids! I am happy that she recognizes me as a resource. in other news my computer better get fixed this weekend! I might just explode if it doesn't. Library computers and husband laptops are good in a pinch but the screens are small and the mouses are not mine!
gtg 3 mins
Wednesday, September 09, 2009
Tuesday, September 08, 2009
Friday, September 04, 2009
Things you don't know
The story behind anything, unless you were there for the whole thing....
I don't know why anyone would want to be married to someone that only ever complains that about them to their girlfriends. Girlfriends are here to listen to us complain about our daily trials and tribulations (good ones at least). I have an acquaintance and I may have even mentioned her before, I have never heard her say a kind or loving word about her husband, is her love always battlefield? No happy stories about romantic stuff, but nothing terrible like being beaten though either? It doesn't sound like he supports a single idea or choice that she has on the first discussion. Every story about something new that she is doing involves the fact that he didn't believe her, trust her or support her and they had to 'work it out'. I get that in most marital things there is a level of discussion and compromise (mine at least) but it seems so extreme that I noticed it enough to blog it. BUT I don't know the whole story, maybe she exaggerates, maybe he does nice things and I just don't hear those stories. I wonder if she knows that the light in which she has painted her relationship and husband is not pleasant? Should I mention it to her or just continue to praise my blissful marriage to my husband and his wonderfulness so that she gets that it makes people feel better to be positive?
I don't know why anyone would want to be married to someone that only ever complains that about them to their girlfriends. Girlfriends are here to listen to us complain about our daily trials and tribulations (good ones at least). I have an acquaintance and I may have even mentioned her before, I have never heard her say a kind or loving word about her husband, is her love always battlefield? No happy stories about romantic stuff, but nothing terrible like being beaten though either? It doesn't sound like he supports a single idea or choice that she has on the first discussion. Every story about something new that she is doing involves the fact that he didn't believe her, trust her or support her and they had to 'work it out'. I get that in most marital things there is a level of discussion and compromise (mine at least) but it seems so extreme that I noticed it enough to blog it. BUT I don't know the whole story, maybe she exaggerates, maybe he does nice things and I just don't hear those stories. I wonder if she knows that the light in which she has painted her relationship and husband is not pleasant? Should I mention it to her or just continue to praise my blissful marriage to my husband and his wonderfulness so that she gets that it makes people feel better to be positive?
Thursday, September 03, 2009
My kids are making me nuts
I am certain that this is not the first post that can have this title, but today they truly are making me nuts. The playroom has been a disaster for over a week and nobody is doing anything about it and it's not getting any better. They are constantly wrestling regardless of how often anyone is hurt or how many times I tell them to stop it.
Once upon a time I thought I had more to write here.... Maybe if my brain power wasn't being sapped out of me...
Once upon a time I thought I had more to write here.... Maybe if my brain power wasn't being sapped out of me...
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